Perfectionism and Anxiety
Anxiety and perfectionism often go hand in hand. High achievers and busy professional women often develop high levels of anxiety as a result of their upbringing. In order to succeed, many high achieving women have learned to succeed by working themselves to the bone. You may be a woman who is used to reaching for the stars and you may attribute your success to your efforts. However, many people around you may see your “success”, and tell you to slow down because you don’t need to put as much effort into everything. The thought of this may trigger your deepest fear. What if you stop and everything you built comes crashing down. What if you reel in the anxiety. Does this increase your potential to fail? After all your anxiety and perfectionism is your driving force to succeed. Right?
There are two sides to the coin when it comes to anxiety and perfectionism
When individuals are at the end of their rope and begin therapy in Florida, often it is a result of their perceived failure to not control what is going on, burnout, or exhaustion. High achievers want to be able to cope with the anxiety or make it go away. In fact, when asked during the educational part of therapy many clients report feeling saying that they always believe anxiety is bad or harmful. But, did you know that anxiety can be good?
Healthy Adapative Anxiety and Perfectionism
Anxiety is a natural part of our genetic makeup. It helps with our flight or fight responses. As individuals who want to survive, this keeps us living and thriving. If you consider how anxiety can be helpful let’s consider how it has caused us to get to where we are currently. In one sense this aspect of yourself may have driven you to be a successful lawyer, great mother, manager, etc.
How Can Anxiety Work for You?
Can provide the necessary energy to complete tasks
A protective mechanism
Can help you understand your core values
Directs your attention to where it needs to be
Can teach you to find balance in your life
Maladaptive Anxiety and Perfectionism
The flip side of the coin is self-doubt, crushing pressure, fear of failure, lack of resilience, and in some cases a lack of humility manifested in hiding mistakes due to shame or guilt. This is brought about by holding yourself to unrealistic expectations and listening to the pressures of the external world.
Harmful effects of maladaptive anxiety
Avoidance
Self-Harm
Passive-Aggressiveness
Anger
Maladaptive daydreaming
Risky behaviors
Tips for Managing Anxiety and Perfectionism
(1) Start identifying your anxiety as a smoke detector.
99% of the time when the smoke detector goes off there isn’t a real threat or fire, the oven is maybe a little too hot, maybe there’s something slightly burnt, but it isn’t an emergency. Label the anxiety as a smoke detector - then investigate and evaluate. Is this a reason to be worried? An imminent risk? Is there really danger here? And, is this really a problem?
Often with anxiety and perfectionism, we are either too busy to pause or too controlled by our feelings to investigate, however, in online therapy in Florida, this is one of the first things we look at in therapy. You have to develop the awareness and understanding of what is happening to understand how to best cope. Slow down, take a breathe, and be mindful of what is going on right now.
(2) Stop spending copious amounts of time to perfect something.
Do you spend much of your time ensuring that your projects are perfect, you’re the best friend or family member, the best employee, and on top of it all the time? This sounds exhausting and I am sure it is. Furthermore, you may be an individual who spends hours upon hours ensuring that a task, project, or relationship is perfect before moving on to the next item. If it is not you repeatedly beat yourself up or spend even more time ensuring that a task is done to your level of perfection. Listen and listen well. SOMETIMES GOOD ENOUGH IS GOOD ENOUGH. Take that in and truly hear it.
(3) Perfectionism becomes unhealthy when there’s an unrealistic attempt to reach excessively high or impossible goals.
This falls in line with the last point, but anxiety and perfectionism are unhealthy when you’re risking your sanity, mental health, and physical health. If you stay up till 2 am working on something because you can’t leave it less than perfect, then you may need support. You should not be holding yourself to these hard-to-reach standards. Mostly because it’s not sustainable and as soon as you begin you will crash and burn out.
(4) Interrupt the self-critical voice in your head.
Do you spend most of your days consumed with the perceived thoughts of failures and disappoints you believe you live up to? Fight back! You are capable of being so much more because you are. It is so easy to tear ourselves apart when we are out here doing the most.
Replace that self-critical voice with a positive statement, or try to redirect thoughts to more constructive thinking. For example, “It’s okay if this isn’t perfect”.
(5) Reach out to a professional.
I know what you may be thinking, I don’t need to go to online therapy in Florida. After all, you get up every day you work hard, you’re looked up to, you are on top of it. However, therapy isn’t for those who are struggling. We are all a work in progress and we need different levels of support based on the different seasons of our lives. As an anxiety therapist, I specialize in this type of thinking and can help you examine the negative and positive aspects this has had on your life. Therapy for perfectionism and anxiety treatment in Florida can empower you to take control where it matters in life.
(6) Once you reach out for anxiety treatment and therapy for perfectionism
Remember that it’s important to stick with the therapy. Perfectionists tend to drop therapy before getting into the real dirt, which is related to showing others flaws and imperfections. Therapy for perfectionism and anxiety treatment in Florida with me is a judgment-free zone - I won’t think less of you for your imperfections.
There is hope and healing as you manage anxiety and perfectionism
While you may be battling with a sense of control and your inner critic, know that perfectionism is often a way of avoiding rejection or criticism from others, maybe sometimes yourself. You may try and control every aspect of your life, but you can’t. While you may believe that perfectionism can be controlled on its own, remember that if you’re overwhelmed by the self-critical voice or are experiencing the above signs of maladaptive perfectionism and anxiety, it’s time to speak with an anxiety therapist in Florida.
Self-Care Tips for Anxiety and Perfectionism
Learn to say no.
Believe it or not, it’s ok to say NO! As a perfectionist and a highly anxious person, this can feel like the end of the world when you have people to impress and jobs to do. However, know that as an important part of self-care you can be choosy with your commitments. If you’re overwhelmed with everything you have to do, just say no. Your psyche will thank you. Remember to evaluate your goals and values and see what does and does not fall in line. Burnout should not be one of those.
Unplug for an evening.
This means from socials, phones, tech, and emails. Turn it all off! Go on a walk, go to a coffee shop, talk to a friend, read, take a bath, or binge a missed show.
Practice gratitude.
With all that we are striving for, sometimes we forget to be appreciative of what we have and what we have already accomplished. Research finds that practicing and expressing gratitude increases overall happiness and life satisfaction. So do it! Write it down, text your friends, or affirm yourself.
Declutter and Clean!
Do you know what can easily add stress to your life? A chaotic workspace or messy home. It has been shown that an organized workspace can reduce stress and depression. When items don’t have a place it can feel like the space is shrinking. So take a few minutes to declutter and see how your mental space feels.
Change up your routine
This may also be a small exercise in exposure, so stick with me. If you believe that your anxiety and perfectionism are what helps you thrive and succeed, it may be time to throw a wrench in it. Try taking a new route to work, switch up when you get certain tasks done, or try something new. You may find that you’re just as successful with less effort and stress than you realize. Suddenly the world isn’t closing in one itself.
Accumulate Positives
One of the hardest things about being a perfectionist is giving yourself credit for what you do well. Write down a list of tips or things you have done well. Recognizing all you have accomplished for yourself and others can help you breathe and relax. Take a look at this list of wins or tips to reduce stress when you’re struggling to give yourself grace. Trust me, it could be helpful!
FIND HOPE AGAIN WITH ANXIETY TREATMENT AND THERAPY FOR PERFECTIONISM IN TAMPA, JACKSONVILLE, MIAMI, AND ANYWHERE VIA ONLINE THERAPY IN FLORIDA!
Anxiety and perfectionism can be challenging to manage when from the outside, it seems you have it all together. However, when you’re feeling drained, exhausted, and unheard burnout and unhealthy coping mechanisms can intensify. It may be time to get support from a caring and understanding anxiety therapist. When you begin online therapy in Florida, you will work with Danielle Eaton, your online therapist. If you’re ready to find hope and healing to move forward, then take the next steps to begin services. To get started, follow these simple steps:
Contact Danielle Eaton by filling out an online therapy form.
Learn more about your anxiety and perfectionist therapist.
Start taking care of your mental health and well-being
OTHER SERVICES DANIELLE EATON CAN HELP YOU WITH!
You deserve support in a space that will help you understand your story and create healthy practices to live a meaningful life. Therapy goes at your pace, it’s for you! If you’re seeking anxiety treatment and therapy for perfectionism, with Danielle Eaton in Florida get in touch today! If you’re seeking another service, additional services include therapy for young adults, therapy for moms (parenthood and postpartum support) depression, PTSD treatment and trauma therapy, individual relationship therapy, therapy for identity and exploration, and abuse recovery. When you’re ready to begin, I am here to support you!
